I pay attention to what people search for when they come across my blog. Usually I just get a kick out of it because people find me by way of searching for “give a shit” with a disturbing frequency (true story!).
Today someone came upon my blog by searching WordPress for “gossiping as a social power for women”.
In my post GenY Women in the Workplace I urged women to stop the gossiping. Dare I say there might be social benefit to gossiping I had never considered? I can’t ignore that question!
Apart from the obvious situations like spousal abuse or the like, gossiping does have it’s advantages… sometimes. Note: I am not endorsing all out gossip warfare. For the purposes of this post, let’s assume “gossip” means “watercooler chit-chat”, not bitchy “OMG IDK WTF” malicious gossiping.
What kinds of advantages, you ask?
1) Gen Y ladies are still learning the ropes in life. Keen Millennials will listen and learn. Who’s doing well? Who’s mid-breakdown and, if they are, why? This type of intel will help reinforce knowledge on what to do and what not to do on someone else’s dime. These aren’t college classes but they are classes on the subject of life lessons. Watch, listen and learn for the cheapest education cost ever: FREE.
2) A heads-up on “the competition” isn’t always a bad thing. Just because the info is out there doesn’t mean it’s always actionable. Having a good perspective into the ‘real world’ matter of competition in life means a having a leg-up is a good thing.
3) Teamwork and trust is reinforced, assuming everyone is trustworthy and what they’re saying is honest. Which leads us to…
4) the importance of social accountability. Water cooler chit-chat gets around. It’s a fact of life. Some people actively avoid it, some don’t. It still remains that gossiping exists to keep other people accountable. I love this quote from “Gossip As A Gauge Of A Religion’s Commitment To Reality” by Luke Ford which pretty much sums it up:
Gossip undoubtedly destroys friendships, marriages, business partnerships and sometimes causes people to kill themselves and others, but much of the time, the damage that is blamed on gossip more rightly belongs on people who have acted badly. Such people often blame gossip for holding them accountable for their behavior.
So what do you think? Am I wrong? Let me know if the comments, please!
I really like this post because you point out some of the things we don’t realize we need from gossiping. As you said, there are social or political rules we may need to follow in the workplace, but you could not realize you’re breaking one until it’s too late. Some of the gossip can actually help define what some of those rules might be and save you some war wounds down the line. I think also we learn so much from how not to do something, yet we’re often looking for advice on what to do. As people were leaving jobs or badmouthing employers online, the gossip mill may have been running at full speed, but you probably know have to handle yourself in a better manner than others. Nice post!
Hi there, Emily!
You make a really good point: ” I think also we learn so much from how not to do something, yet we’re often looking for advice on what to do.” Seems there are a lot of snake-oil salesmen telling us what to do when the lesson of what NOT to do is right in front of us.
Thanks for dropping in! I appreciate your comment!
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